On Behaving Like A Lady

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AMDG

Now before I embark upon this task, I wish to make it very clear that any unladylike behavior does not justify any ungentlemanly behavior. Now that that is out of the way... We women these days have a lot of pressure on us to be in every way perfect. I never condone the forces of perfectionism. They are responisible for so much havoc and unhappiness. This post does not associate itself with any part of that dark alliance.

We women also want respect. We also want to be approachable, but not "easy". No woman really wants that. We want to be trusted, but not taken for granted. We want to stir desire but we also want to inspire wonder. We want to work, but we do not want to be overwhelmed. We want to serve but we do not want to be enslaved. We want to be strong but we do not want to be hard. We are warriors accustomed to battle but we do not want to be ungentle.

Every person on the face of this earth is a paradox by nature. This is especially true of women. This is one of the many reasons why men will never plumb the mystery of our natures. We will always be a marvellous and captivating mystery to them and that is how it should be.

Having said this, it boggles my mind how many women whom I know to want respect as well as desire act in a way so unworthy of them. Well, let me modify that. I know that many of these behaviors are done so as to gain attention from men or because they mistakenly believe that men want that from them. But not only is it secretly not what women want, it is not what any man worth his salt wants.

Ladies, be honest. If you think you are exempt from being undignified or being too dependent on male attention, ask yourself these questions:


1. Have you ever worn a pair of slacks or jeans that were far too tight to be comfortable or professional, but you wore them anyway because you wanted to draw attention to your butt and legs?

2. Have you ever worn a skirt that was far too short for you to bend over in without flashing somebody but you wore it anyway? Why? Because you had great legs and if you have them you should flaunt them?

3. Has any man ever opened the door for you and you snapped at him? Why? DO YOU HONESTLY THINK that the gentleman is doing that because HE REALLY BELIEVES that YOU CANNOT OPEN A BLOODY DOOR!!!?

4. Has any man ever offered to help you with your coat in a non-sensuous way and you refused him?

5. Have you ever been on a date with a fellow and insisted that you split the check with him, just to cheat him out of the oppurtunity to do some little sweet gesture for you?

6. Have you ever worn a low cut blouse, dress or shirt, even though you knew that you would be tucking your breasts back in your shirt every time you went to the bathroom or tugging your bra down lower so it would not show? Why? Was it because you knew that men can't stop staring at them because they are gorgeous?


7. Have you ever sat in a way to purposefully draw attention to your legs in a group setting?

8. Have you ever called a man when he did not call you when he said he would?

9. Have you ever let a man kiss you after a date, when you really did not feel ready for it or comfortable with it?

10. Have you ever let a man act like he was your lover or your husband when he was not your lover or your husband?

11. Have you ever danced in front of somebody with the intent of arousing him/them when you had not intention of every sating what you aroused.

12. Have you ever become sexually involved with a man whom you knew would never marry you and did not really love you.

13. Have you ever sat there and laughed at a chauvinistic or misogynistic joke or a dirty joke or crudity or cursing that made you feel uncomfortable or offended you secretly?


I know that some of these things seem very small. Why do these things matter in terms of being respected and valued. If you only knew how it makes you look. It does not make men respect you. It does not empower you. It does not free you. It only makes people think that they can conquer you with little or no effort on their part.
The bottom line is: A lady loves herself and everybody around her. Mr. Right is looking for a lady who is confident and respects herself. Mr. Player-Dead-Wrong is looking for someone who he can misuse with no negative consequences. Being a lady scares Mr. Dead-Wrong and shows him how weak and pathetic he really is. It reinforces and rewards Mr. Right for being so courteous, respectful and kind.